day 345

The following conversation summarises my life so far.

Nurse/Doctor: I greet you in the name of (muttered something incomprehensible). You have arrived late (but it was already 4 in the morning). There is no rush. We can settle the formalities necessary for employing you. Of course, you will have your identity papers.

I: I would very much like to be an actor (incomprehensible).

Nurse: Yes, yes. You can wear blue.

Doctor: And your name?

I: (still incomprehensible) Roland Maximaritus Enoch Lin Qong Nanthayathusam

Father: Lim.
Sister: Alvin
Brother: Yong Hui
Mother: Ah B
Grandmother: Eng Hui
Others: Alvin Lim Eng Hui

some time later...

Ah B: I know nothing about acting.

Teacher: What would you like to be?

Yong Hui: Pat(h)-olo-gis(t)! (brackets indicated missing sounds)

Teacher: What would you like to be?

Lim: I would like to be a Software Engineer.

Police Officer: What would you like to be?

Lim Eng Hui, Alvin: Maybe an officer like you.

Teacher: What would you like to be?

Alvin: I have no fucking idea.

Sergeant: What you want?

Recruit Lim: An OFFICER!

Lecturer: What would you not like to be?

Lim Eng Hui: Like anyone else.

I: What would you like to be?

Alvin Lim A director. A playwright. An academic. A lecturer. Someone...


Random stranger: Are you out of work?

I: Yes.

Random Stranger: Where were you engaged last?

I: (as if exasperated by the constant interrogation) I was an actor!

Stranger: We know that.

I: We?

Stranger: Quite so. (and falls silent)


Sometime later, it occurred to me that the precious little I had could do nothing to change the path I took to reach here. It was always going to be a single occupation I was destined to have - an actor. I think I did a pretty good job so far, considering how I have not been chased off the stage. And then...

A gentleman: What did you want to study originally? (almost a whisper I couldn't hear)

A.: I wanted to be myself.

Gentleman: Well, you can't turn into yourself all at once...but perhaps it would suit you for the
time being to to be a human being.

pause

reduced to a whisper, I did what was told. And the rest is history.



She: What do you want to be?
I: I want to be us - You and I.